- The entire plot of Lord of the Rings: "Put that thing back where it came from or so help me."
Reblogging to fix the fucking source.
The bat one is stunning!
(via leelovesthee)
JESUS TUMBLR
Captain Picard has an Android phone with unlimited Data.
ANDROID PHONE WITH UNLIMITED DATA
(via nakoninja)
I need a site that has kind of cheaper dresses (like 30 dollars or less would be fantastic) that are rockabilly/pin up dresses for someone who is a size 18. They don’t have to be too fancy, I can jazz that part up, I just suck at making things lately and would like a fancy dress..
- Everyone at my school's idea of a relationship: Someone asks someone "Will you go out with me?" and the other person says yes. They hug in the hallways, hold hands in the morning before the bell rings, and they kiss at lunch. They say "I love you" after two days. The whole school agrees that they are the cutest couple ever and hopes that they will last.
- My idea of a relationship: You start talking to each other and is in the "talking stage". One person asks you to go a date with them. You guys go a few more dates. You guys are dating. You guys act like a couple. You hug, you hold hands, you kiss. One person asks you to be their boyfriend/girlfriend. You guys are now officially a couple. You're in one of those relationships where you don't announce it to the whole world but you won't deny it if someone asked. You guys are comfortable around each other, you hang out outside of school. You say "I love you" when the time is right and when you actually mean it. You have a threeway with Satan. You agree that all other mortals are no better than the mud caked to your collective shoes and sacrifice the whole of your school to the Dark Lord as per his request mid-coitus. You rule the charred and ruined remains of your homeland with an iron fist. Together <3
Tree struck by lightning caused the bark to explode, effectively stripping the tree
nothing gets me hotter than a good old strip treese
(via nakoninja)
So my mom and I have been working the same waitress job for 5-6 years now. She had been waitressing years before, but this is recently. Anyway, about… 15 minutes ago this guy she waited on left and told her to take care. Just that. Prior to this she had talked to him about Italy. Her people are from Florence, this and that, and she said she’s never been. She’s got 8 years of art education and she’s working a waitress job. It’s pretty… Sad and disappointing, I guess. Her and my father divorced 6 years ago and she hasn’t had a real job ever. Just been stuck in a small town she’s not from.
This man who we have never seen before tipped her 1000 dollars for a trip to Italy. Walked out, not another word.
…you know. Just when I start to lose faith in humanity….Hm.
He’s 42 cents short…
(via ramen-noodle101)
theperksofbeingateenagenarwhal:
i wish i had a super tight-knit group of friends that i fought crime with
i wish i had a super tight-knit group of friends that i committed crimes with
I wish I had a super tight-knit group of friends
I wish I had friends
I wish I could knit
(via galloping-gallifreyan)
i’m like 97% sure i’d be the best girlfriend ever but no one will ever know
(via amphata)
Two scientists walk into a bar
The first scientist says ‘I’ll have a glass of H2O”
The second scientist says ‘I’ll have a glass of water too. Wh… why did you say H2O? Like, I know it’s the chemical formula for water and all, but it’s the end of the day and there’s really no need to intentionally over-complicate things like that in a situation outside of work”
The first scientist stares at his drink, angry that his assassination plan has failed.
I
(via rufiohhh)
For those of you who don’t understand archaeology, I have made a diagram.
CASE CLOSED.
(via galloping-gallifreyan)
